Happy People And Writing Books With David Essel
Episode 394: Happy People And Writing Books With David Essel
When we think about happiness, people associate it with having the most money, the best bodies, or the best relationships. All of those could be true, but the truth is things could go either way. You could be happy having money or unhappy about having money. However, there is one trait that every happy person has – emotional regulation. In this episode, David Essel joins Mitch Stephen to talk about emotional regulation and share some therapeutic ways on how to be happy. David is a master life coach who aims to help people and positively affect their lives no matter what circumstances they are on. Listen in as David and Mitch talk about emotions and life decisions one can make to work towards happiness.
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I’m here with David Essel and this guy is dear to my heart. Sometimes in life, the right people come and sit in front of you and help you sort your crap out. I had some baggage I was carrying. I had been drinking and smoking for 40 years. I didn’t smoke the whole time, but the last years were heavy and it was killing me. I’m going to confess and maybe David may not even know this, but I got him on my show under the pretext that we work in a business with a bunch of Triple-A people, real estate investors running around like chickens with their heads cut off. We’re all Triple-A half the time and ADD. There’s a lot of alcohol and a lot of alcoholism. I see it every day. Every meeting is over alcohol. If you’re not careful, the lunches will start to be about alcohol and it’s everywhere. I’m sure it’s not just real estate investors. It’s probably anybody who’s way wound up in their business, in their click, and in their niche. Alcohol was at all the REIA meetings. It was everywhere and I wanted to stop. I was afraid to stop. I got him on under the pretext that there are a lot of people out there that need help.
The truth of the matter was I needed help and I needed to quiz this guy. I wanted to meet this guy because he had a holistic approach to solving addictions, whether they be drugs or alcohol. I was very interested in that. I’m not bashing the other way, but the other way, you walk in and say, “I’ve been an alcoholic for fifteen years.” I thought, “Why would you claim that?” Because what we know about life and the way the brain works, 99 years later, you don’t go claim that. If you’re a paraplegic one day and you stand up and walk, you’re no longer a paraplegic. Why would you keep walking in on your two legs and saying, “I’m a paraplegic” when you aren’t? Long story short, I quit drinking on August 1st, 2019 smoking and drinking on the same day. I give a lot of credit to David Essel. I’ve taken a long time to explain this, but it’s important to me and David’s important to me. How are you doing, David?
It’s great to be with you. Any time you want to do that under the pretense in order to benefit your own life, do it, Mitch. It doesn’t matter as long as it works. That’s what our whole philosophy in recovery. Recovery is 20% of my work and then the rest of it goes into all kinds of different topics but I love recovery because we found a system that is different than what has been taught for 80 years. If that works for you, what’s been taught for 80 years, keep doing it. If you’re clean, sober, happy, and that’s the key. A lot of people can stop drinking and they’re miserable. It’s called a dry drunk. They’re irritable, impatient, snippy to their partners and their children and all that kind of stuff. What you see as you go to Mitch 3.0 is that everything that you’re doing is making you happier. It’s making you healthier. That’s when we know you’re in a good recovery program. It’s when you’re happy and you’re making changes other than just stopping drinking.
David’s been recovered for how many years?
For a long time.
He doesn’t like to say because he’s not keeping track. We’re going to talk about the one key that all happy people have in common. This is important because I could not go any further in my life with the weight that I was carrying. It was occupying too much of my time, my space, and my mind. Inadvertently, you don’t know but if you start to look at it, I’m making decisions based on my proclivities to gravitate towards alcohol and cigarettes. I was making lots of decisions, 30 to 40 hours a week. I was hindering around that. I needed more time and I found it there. It’s all in order to become a happier person. I found this topic to be in line with my personal cause and maybe many of you out there.
If you’re thinking about quitting, it took me two years to decide because I was afraid I couldn’t quit and then crap was going to escalate to a whole other level. If I couldn’t quit by myself or with a little help from my friends, then I was having to take it to a whole other level. That scared the living hell out of me. Luckily, I didn’t have to go there. I got it handled by myself and close quarters with a few friends like David and stuff. Let’s see the one key that all happy people have in common and this seems to be the theme. Robert Allen, one of my heroes that I interviewed, put out the book The Four Maps Of Happy Successful People. Everyone’s trying to find the key in the cure. Talk to us about that one key that all happy people have.You know you're in a good recovery program when you're happy and making changes other than just stopping drinking. Click To Tweet
It’s interesting that you say Robert Allen. Years ago, I hosted an infomercial where Robert was the star and I was the host. It was awesome and it was about real estate. He was great and I’ll never forget. I was able to spend about a day with him in Orlando on the TV set, asking him questions. We had a live audience behind us. It was fun. When we think about happiness, a lot of people think the happiest people are those that have the most money. The happiest people are those that have the best bodies. The happiest people are those that have the best relationship. All of those could be true. You could be happy by having money or you could be unhappy having money. You could be happy if you had a great partner or you could be unhappy. Those things could go either way, but there is one trait that every happy person has and it’s a fancy therapeutically term called Emotional Regulation. This is not a trait you’re born with. This is something you’ve got to learn. Every happy person has learned how to emotionally regulate themselves.
Since we’re talking about addiction in the beginning, let’s make that analogy. A person who’s happy would go, “I had a beer and that was great and I’d love to have another one. That could lead to a 3rd, 4th, and 5th. I’m going to emotionally regulate.” In other words, I’m going to step in my own way and say, “That’s enough. You don’t need anymore.” A person that can’t emotionally regulate would be like you and I when we were alcoholics in the past. We would say, “It’s Tuesday. It’s 10:00 at night. Let’s have one more. It’s Tuesday. It’s 1:00. Let’s have one more. Regulation is not for me.” Let me give you another story that makes it super clear. You have to work at this to become a champion in emotional regulation just like you have to work to lose weight. If you’re overweight, it isn’t going to come via your thoughts, you’re not going to lose weight. If you want to be in control of your emotions, you’re going to have to practice.
Here’s another great example. Two people are going to the airport to catch a flight. They both get up super early. They’re both packed in time. They’re going to get to the airport three hours before their flight leaves. They’re both at peace. The day is moving smoothly. Halfway to the airport, there’s an announcement. They’re in two separate cars. There’s an announcement on the radio, “Accident at this junction. Three-hour delay.” They both look at their clocks. They’re going to miss their flight. The person who is not emotionally regulated flips out and justifies.
They’re flipping out calling friends and family, “This is BS. This is crap. This shouldn’t be happening.” They get so riled up. “Why me?” Victim, murderhood, all that kind of stuff. They’re angry. The person who is emotionally regulated has frustration. They could be angry. They could be upset that they’re going to miss their flight and they give themselves five minutes to feel that. They could hit the dashboard. They could do whatever, but five minutes later, they stopped away. They go, “That’s all I needed. Let me get on the phone. Let me call the airlines. I don’t need to call my six friends and complain a bitch about what happened. Let me be proactive.”
Another example of emotional regulation of relationships. I’ve been teaching this couple and it can take a long time. They have a long-term relationship and it’s based on arguing. They love to argue. They both have to be right. One of them can’t walk away from an argument. No matter how small, they’ve got to say one more little push there. They’ve got to push that button one more time. They’ve got to roll their eyes. They’ve got to sigh. They’ve got to make some big dramatic thing out of it. I’ve been working with them and we finally got a breakthrough. The emotional regulation with a couple that goes into repetitive disagreements would be one of them has to think, “Here we go down that road again. I’m going to take a big breath and let them win. I’m going to take a big breath and say, ‘Honey, let’s wait another hour or two and let’s come back to the topic.’” In other words, someone is in control of their emotions, but it’s not easy. You’ve got to work at this.
I’d say that was one of the things when I was trying to make changes, from 2.0 to 2.1 to 2.2. I deemed myself Mitch 2.0 at the beginning of this journey and then I quit smoking, I was 2.1 now. I quit drinking, I was 2.2. I discovered I couldn’t quit smoking unless I quit drinking because my will power would go out. Every time I made another step, I added two point to the end. I’m up to 2.9 now. One of the things was I had to learn to recognize when I was at the decision point, where I was going to go over the edge or whatever it was. Whether it was, “Am I going to make the decision to get out of bed and go work out or not?” Right at that point and then I had to decide when I get to that point, how to recognize it? When I get there, what am I going to use psychologically or whatever to engage me or disengage me from what it is I’m thinking about? Learning to recognize it is the first step.
The first thing we do is ask our clients to start on a daily basis to chart the times when they emotionally lose it. Maybe in traffic. They have minor road rage. Maybe they’re on the phone and they’re put on hold. They freak out being put on hold.
Mine is when my computer doesn’t work, I completely lose my shit. I want to break it with a hammer. I’ve taken all the hammers out of reach away from me.
What we do is we would have Mitch write down the 2 or 3 areas of life where he hasn’t learned how to control those emotions. When you put it in writing, that’s the first step. Now we’re hyper aware. You can say in your brain, Mitch, “The next time my computer goes down, I’m going to not freak out.” When you put it in writing, and then here’s the next key, what are you going to do when your computer doesn’t work instead of freaking out? We have the problem. “I don’t have good emotional control when my electronics go down,” and then we have to write, “What am I going to do?” It might be taking five big breaths. It might be slapping your hands hard one time to snap yourself out of it. “It’s out of my control. I don’t have control over this computer. Let me reboot. Let’s see if that works.” We write down a list of steps to take so that we have tools. Let’s say with you, with the computer. How many years have you had a computer? We got our first one in 1995. From 1995 to now, and let’s say you got one at 1995.
In your subconscious mind, and you and I have talked about this a ton, when you set a pattern for twenty years, that when the computer or the iPhone or the iPad doesn’t work, that you freak out or you get upset. That subconscious wants to keep that pattern going because you fed it just like drinking. You have to say, “What am I going to substitute for my freak out with the electronic devices?” That’s why we write it down. You then have that next to you. If you’re willing to do the work, we can snap that habit in a heartbeat just like we can. When I say a heartbeat, if it’s been twenty years, it might take six months to snap it. Six months is a heartbeat compared to twenty years of frustration.
What would I do? Coach me now on that one subject.
I gave one example. Number one, snap ourselves out of it. The computer doesn’t come on and you start to feel the blood pressure rise. You start to feel your frustration. Clap your hands in front of your face, right that concentration. You then go, “What are my other options?” We look at it. I can reboot the computer. That’s my second option. The first one is to snap myself out of it. The second one, let’s reboot. That often helps almost all electronic devices. I don’t know why, but it does. If that doesn’t work, I’m going to walk away from the desk for fifteen minutes to take a big breath, let myself relax a little bit, then I’m going to come back. I’ll call someone, IT support, whatever I have to do. Those would be three steps.
We would say, number one, snap your hands to get yourself out of that mindset. Number two reboot and if that doesn’t work, get up and walk away. Give yourself 10, 15 minutes to take a break and then come back. We do the same thing with relationships. Someone’s got to go, “I can’t go down that path again.” They’re the ones that have to stand up and say, “Let’s take an hour. We’ll come back and discuss this tonight or let’s wait until tomorrow.” The most ultimate move if it’s not a huge decision is, “Let’s do it your way.”Every happy person has learned how to emotionally regulate themselves. Click To Tweet
One of the things I found that was causing me a lot of the stress points in my life was I wasn’t showing up early enough. If anything went wrong or if the computer wouldn’t work, I didn’t have time to reboot. Robert Allen is waiting for me. It is a big deal and for whatever reason, my computer decides not to work. I wasn’t getting there early enough. I put in my mind to get in every place fifteen minutes early, which means to me, I have to plan to get there 30 minutes early because I’m a fifteen-minute later guy. If I’m supposed to be at some place at 7:00, I put it in my computer, I’m supposed to be there at 6:30. I start like that and it’s stupid but you learn how to deal with your bullshit yourself.
That’s a step of solution. That’s not bullshit that’s a solution step. We say, “I show up late. I’m going to make myself believe that I’ve got to be there early.” It doesn’t matter but that’s a tool that I’m talking about. As you apply that tool and you get better at it, your happiness level is going to go up because when you get there, there isn’t the frantic adrenaline rush.
You get on two wheels and you’re all flustered. They start talking to you before you even have a chance to come down. You don’t feel professional and in control as you do when you’re fifteen minutes early and you get to go have a coffee and you’re sitting down and you’re waiting for them to show up. They look flustered and I’ll have the upper hand. I’m calm and cool. This guy’s all flustered. I’m going to negotiate his pants off.
You’re in control emotionally and that is what’s going to lead you to be happier. When you’re negotiating a happier partner, a happier friend is when you’re able to control those emotions. In this country, with the racial unrest and all the other crap going down, this topic is super important. I tell people that our government officials need to learn this. They need to learn how to emotionally regulate instead of just going off as many of them do with their tirades and their anger and all that stuff. There’s no emotional regulation there, but our country needs it to able to start to calm things down.
Let me make a couple of comments. When I think of people in the past who mastered emotional regulation, Martin Luther King. He’s a master of it. Gandhi was a master of emotional regulation. Nelson Mandela, a master. These guys were the best negotiators the world has ever seen. There’s no one that can out negotiate Gandhi, Martin Luther King, or Nelson Mandela. Why do I say that? Gandhi brought India back to its own country from British rule with no force whatsoever. That’s how powerful he was as a negotiator. He was in control of his emotions.
When the British government continued to pummel him over and over again with no concessions on their part, he stood silently. He would go on fasts. He would argue with the quietest voice. All attorneys know this when you’re in the courtroom and you use a soft voice, everyone has to listen. These guys mastered the whole concept of emotional regulation. Nelson Mandela emotionally regulated during 27 years in prison. He learned how to do it. He came out to become the leader of South Africa. We have role models to follow. People that do it amazingly well and when we do it, our happiness level goes through the roof.
We choose to be happy or sad and I get it, but there are little bitty things every day that triggered you and were smaller triggers. The big blanket statement, you can choose to be happier or you can choose to be sad. The glass is half full or the glass is half empty. Those are great big things. The question now is what triggers you? Here’s for the real estate investors out there. I used to get wound up, frustrated and aggravated because it seemed like I, as a real estate entrepreneur, always had to honor my word, no matter if it costs me money or if I made money. The aggravating times is when I had to honor my word and I had to write a check to honor my word because things didn’t work out the way I thought they were going to work out. No one ever had to honor their written signed contract to me. Tenants were screwing me. People were stealing my air conditioners when they left and I finally had to get to a place where I said, “I am bigger than all of them and I will be more successful than all of them combined. I cannot let them affect me.”
Now when someone says, “Someone stole your air-conditioner.” I say, “Call the air conditioner man.” That’s how my life is. Part of my success is I have to deal with that. I’m not going to give it any time. I can jump up and down on my desk and throw stuff across the office and believe me, I did. I want to kill the next thief I found. I sit there and plot and plan how I can catch these guys so I can beat the living crap out of them. I spent and wasted so much energy on that. My friend, Sam Madrid, who somehow had this in him more naturally, I would go, “How come you’re not fuming mad? They just cost us $25,000.” He goes, “There’s nothing we can do about it, Mitch. We’ve got a set of cards in our hand and now we’ve got to play the next card. What are we going to bet? How many cards do we want? We’ve got to go to the next move. I’ve got no time to cry about the five cards I got in my hand now. I’ve got to figure out what the next move is. This game is moving forward.”
For the example you gave, what I would like the audience to do is take a moment with a pen and write down the several things that you know flip you out. We need to see it in writing. Is it traffic? Is it your partner? Is it your children? Is it your business partner? Are there certain clients that drive you nuts every time you see them texting, calling or emailing. We need to write it down because then we have to have a plan. This stuff doesn’t change because you and I are having a great conversation about it. Awareness is the first step, but awareness doesn’t change a damn thing. Knowledge is not power. It used to be when Edison said that years ago or whoever said it, “Knowledge is power,” but it’s not power. I know some very smart people that have crap lives. They’re knowledgeable in many areas of life, but they’re not applying their knowledge.
I remember there was a Buddhist monk out in San Francisco. He led the biggest Buddhist congregation out there. He was a raging alcoholic at night but no one knew it except for those in his inner circles that took his abuse on a regular basis. Finally, one of them had approached him and said, “You can’t be a happy person. I don’t care if you’re a Buddhist. I don’t care if you have 40 years as a Buddhist monk. You can’t be happy drinking like this,” and he awoken. The awareness all of a sudden, he goes, “You’re right.” He got humble, he got vulnerable, and he asked for help. His life turned around so dramatically. He even said in an article that the things that used to tick him off in the evening, one of his assistants not doing X, Y, or Z, he just took a big breath and started to let things flow. That’s emotional regulation. As I say to my clients, “If you don’t write down those areas of life where you have a tendency to knee jerk reaction and lose it, you won’t change. The awareness is there, but you have no steps to follow.”
The key to happiness is emotional regulation. Figure out what your triggers are. Learn to recognize when they’re about to happen or happening, and then have a plan to deal with them. My deal with drinking was when I wanted to drink, I was going to get tea. I needed this motion going but I wasn’t going to put alcohol in it. I had it set up and then I found healthier things. At first, I would want to hit my thumb with a hammer. I thought, “That will change my mind about everything. I’ll smash it with a hammer and I’ll say, “I don’t feel like smoking anymore. I don’t want a cigarette.”
It’s always a pleasure to talk to you. You have an event and it’s non-related although it’s a subject dear to my heart. I’ve written three books myself. I didn’t plan to write the first one. It just happened because a tragedy in my life happened. I didn’t know it, but while I was journaling, I was cataloging my life, which turned out to be My Life and 1,000 Houses. I didn’t know anything else to talk about because I was buying a house every 4 to 5 days. That was my life. When I said, “I better catalog my life,” houses were everywhere in it. My Life & 1,000 Houses: Failing Forward to Financial Freedom was a book I wrote on accident. I then chose to write two books on purpose because from this book, the over overriding question of the day was, “How do you find all these houses to buy at discounts?”Every person has at least one great book in them. Click To Tweet
I wrote My Life & 1,000 Houses: 200+ Ways to Find Bargain Properties and then I wrote My Life & 1,000 Houses: The Art of Owner Financing because I wanted to show no one was talking about selling your houses on 30-year fixed notes and not being a landlord and just collecting a payment. At the time, I don’t think anyone was talking about it in 2008, 2009, 2010. Writing a book is probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I’ve tried hiring ghostwriters and I feel like it’s not me. I’m paying for a writer to write a book to put my name on it. I have to go through the whole thing anyway and rewrite it to get my personality in the book plus correct all the things that the ghostwriter said that I said, “That’s not how it works. You’ve got to change it.” It’s easier to write it yourself. You have this seminar coming up on How To Write A Book In 30 Days. I’m going to come myself. I want to come.
Mitch, I want you there. It is going to be so much fun. I started writing books many years ago and I made every mistake in the world, which is why I love to teach this. We teach this one-on-one and then we got many people asking about it. We said, “Let’s go to a webinar. Let’s open it up.” People can join us and what we do is we go through the steps to make a book fun to write. We’ve taught people how to write a complete book in 30 days. The principles that we teach in the program, we teach if you want to learn how to write a book and take 6 months or 1 year or 2 years, you can.
What we want to show people is that if you do it the way the system we’ve created, you can do it as quickly as 30 days. It’s about organization. That’s the number one thing. If you ever hit writer’s block, we say in our program, you should never hit writer’s block and we tell you why you hit writer’s block. Writer’s block is all about an unfinished outline. I’ve got a bunch of clients one-on-one that I’m taking through this program. A couple of them I said, “Don’t write any chapters until we get the outline done.” They’re enthusiastic as we all are, “I’m going to write this book.” They start with chapter one, they go to chapter two, they go to chapter three and they go, “Where do I go?”
I always did it without the outline. I’m stupid but I need to correct that self-talk, “I’m smarter than that. I’ll get it better the next time.” I forget what I’ve written then I start writing things over again and then it becomes confusing. Now I’ve got to read all of my own stuff from beginning to end, however many pages I have to figure out if it’s flowing right or not. Whereas if I have had a good outline, I would cover the ground twice.
It happens all the time. We teach you how to do it and we do it specifically. A lot of times when you don’t have a good outline, you’ll get done and you’ll go, “Chapter nine is really chapter two. Chapter one is really chapter five.” It turns into a hornet’s nest.
It’s funny you say that because I’ve taken all my chapters and I’m a visual person. I put them all out and I’ve laid them on the floor. I’m standing there in my living room with all these chapters laid out on the floor. I go, “That chapter goes over there.” I can’t do it on a screen or whatever. For some reason, I have to have them all laid down on the floor. Sometimes I’ll pick them up and start reading through the chapter and go, “That one doesn’t go there.” Finally, I got it all done on the floor and I’ll take a picture of the floor. I don’t know why. Why is that?
I do the same thing. I’m a visual person. When my manuscript is being done, I will do the same thing that you do. I put it all on the floor because I’m a big visual person too. The biggest difference is when you do the outline the way we teach you, it is detailed that before you even start to write one chapter, you go, “Chapter two is chapter ten. I’m not even going to start writing yet because seven is one.” We do all that before we even write one paragraph. That takes a lot of discipline because most of us are so excited to get writing that we go, “I’ve got this.”
One of my clients has a physically, mentally, and emotionally challenged child who is twenty and he’s in a group home. They got him into a group home. I’ve worked with him and the mom for years. I encouraged her. She’s writing this most amazing book for parents that have an emotionally and/or physically challenged child. It might be autistic. There are all kinds of different conditions. When we started talking I said, “Let’s look for sponsorship.” This is something that some of your audiences and some of your followers maybe like to hear. If you’re going to write a book on real estate, could you get a mortgage company to help sponsor? Could you get a bank to get involved? Could you get past clients who love you to write great endorsements?
Are there other people experts in the field that you go, “It would be super to get this person who’s well-known like Robert Allen to write a paragraph or two for this book?” We start thinking. With her, she has Special Olympics. With her Special Olympics contact, we’re going to see if we can put their logo on the cover of the book that says, “Endorsed by Special Olympics.” Ronald McDonald House, she works closely with them so we’re contacting them. Before she’s even written the outline, we start going through and thinking of who might be a great person to put a quote in the book. We start doing all this promotional thought before we do that outline. That’s step one.
Step two, now we do the outline. The online is detailed. Let’s say chapter one is How I Failed In The Housing Market Before I Succeeded. That would be a great first chapter. Underneath that, we’d write little storylines like my first failed home, advice from the banker, statistics about people that do the work that I do. Before we even write a word, we know exactly where we’re flowing from this study to this statistic, to this story, to this expert. We get it all organized and then we go to chapter two. We’re not writing a damn word until we get to the end of all the chapters, and then the clients bring it to me and we walk through it together, “Does it make sense to go from here to here?”
With my client that’s writing the book on special needs for the family, chapter one that she started at was depressing. It’s her story and she’s got to have it in the book, but we didn’t want to start with something very depressing. What was great is she didn’t write a thing. All of a sudden, she said, “This should be chapter five.” I said, “You’re right.” We moved that outline and now we’re starting the book with something that’s filled with hope.
I wanted a book that moved fast. When I was younger, even now. I wasn’t an enthusiastic reader. I didn’t like reading at all and if books didn’t have pictures in them, I hated them. If they had fine print, I hated them even worse. It was like pulling teeth to me and I deemed myself as a slow reader. When I found books that moved fast for me, I automatically considered them a good book. Not because the book was that good. It’s moved fast. I decided when I wrote my book, which was going to end up being 400 pages. I was trying to stretch to give my book more girth or make it look like it had more girth than it did. I started to do things to make the book thicker so it would seem thicker with more pages.
I did some interesting things. One is I started every chapter halfway down the page, big heading. There was half a page reprieve there. I did the font a little bit bigger, but you can’t play that game or make it too obvious, a little bit bigger font. I then tried to finish every chapter with 1 or 2 paragraphs on the last page. You had a 3/4 of a page reprieve there. I took the 19 pictures of the 20 pictures. I hated those books that put the pictures in the middle of the book and they didn’t number the damn pages. I was turning pages and I was getting no credit for it. I put my pictures in the chapters where they belonged and I numbered the pages of the pictures because it’s a page and I turned it, I should get credit.
I did some things. I did one thing that I didn’t know that I was doing. One of the resounding comments in my book is, “This book flies. It’s good and I love it because the chapters are short.” I wrote short chapters because I have ADD and I don’t have a long attention span. By accident, I wrote short chapters, which meant more 3/4 page reprieves at the end, more half pages at the beginning of the chapter where I started. Because I was trying to put a picture in every chapter or every other chapter, there were more pictures. These 400 pages, you’ll read seven minutes and be on page 30. Will that help with anything?
We took our book, Slow Down: The Fastest Way to Get Everything You Want, which I wrote for Hay House Publishing a number of years ago. We started out with eight chapters and I turned it into sixteen chapters, and people loved it because they were shorter chapters. Over the years, it depends to me on the book. There are some books that are like a lot of our books that go heavily into the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, belief systems, those can’t be short chapters. There’s no way. We’ve written books that are 50 pages long and we have books that are 250 pages. When we go through this with the webinar, which we encourage all of your followers to join us.
My dad is 92. We published his book at 91. He’s got a beautiful life story and we had his book published. We will give you the tips because you may want to write a book for your family. That’s what my dad did. He wrote a book for the family. We have relatives and we send a copy to relatives that are still alive. There are not a lot, but he wanted to have a book for the family. Maybe you want a book for your children. Maybe you want to write about what your life was like so your children understand. Maybe you want to write a book on gardening and how it’s changed your life, how you’ve overcome some huge health issues. Maybe you want to write a mystery, novel, a love novel. There are many ways that you can inspire people with writing and what we say is every person has at least one great book in them.
I believe that. I want to tell you this, writing my first book on accident, I was grieving. I was cataloging my life. Some people encourage me to turn it into a book. I wrote 1,200 pages in my grief. I’m trying to figure out who I was and what just happened. How do I go on? What have I done? It turned into that book. It changed my life dramatically for a lot of different reasons. I’ve been in places I never would have gone. I was going out into the world. Even when it doesn’t sell, it moves from hand to hand, from garage sales to people pulling it out of the trash, to people saying, “Can I borrow that book off your coffee table?” Books go all over the place. You can never tell. There are also some tricks on how to capture who’s reading your book because Amazon’s not going to give you the names of the people who ordered your books. You’ve got to do some things to get people to raise their hand and expose themselves inside your book. It’s important.
Please go to 1000Houses.com/essel, there will be all kinds of links. If you’re thinking about beating addiction and about this book seminar, whatever they have to offer, it will be over there. I’d like to thank TaxFreeFuture.com for sponsoring this segment. You have no idea what your financial advisors are not telling you. If you have 401(k)s, IRAs, health retirement plans, health-deferred tax plans or education-deferred tax plans, please go there. If you don’t have them, especially go there. If you already have them go there and watch the 37 little video vignettes and find out how super powerful those programs are if you don’t know already. There are things that you probably don’t know that you can do and there might be some things you shouldn’t do. David, thank you.
It’s always great to be with you. Thank you, Mitch.
About David Essel
David Essel, M. S. O.M., is the number one best-selling author (10), counselor, master life coach, international speaker and minister whose mission is to positively affect 2 million people or more every day, in every area of life, regardless of their current circumstances. Celebrity Jenny McCarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.”
His newest book went #1 bestseller in 3 months, a mystical romance novel set in the Hawaiian Islands called ” Angel on a Surfboard”, which offers the 6 keys to deep love.
Another #1 bestseller ” FOCUS! SLAY YOUR GOALS…THE PROVEN GUIDE TO HUGE SUCCESS, A POWERFUL ATTITUDE AND PROFOUND LOVE”, was recently selected by the influential blog BOOK AUTHORITY.ORG as one of the top 100 GOAL SETTING BOOKS OF ALL TIME!
David’s work of 38 years is also highly endorsed by the late Wayne Dyer, “Chicken Soup for the Soul” author Mark Victor Hansen, as well as many other celebrities and radio and television networks from around the world.
He is verified through Psychology Today as one of the top Counselors and Life Coaches in the USA, and is verified through Marriage.com as one of the top relationship counselors and coaches in the world.